


Never Forgotten

by Whiitewolf



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:14:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26229259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whiitewolf/pseuds/Whiitewolf
Summary: Memories are forever, right? That's what JJ and Hotch think until Hotch is in a terrible accident causing him to lose the last ten years of his life. He has to come to terms with Haley's death and rebuild his relationship with JJ. Full Summary inside
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Jennifer "JJ" Jareau, Jotch - Relationship
Comments: 12
Kudos: 17





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Jack is 12. Henry is 9. And Sam/Sammie (Full name Samantha) is 7.
> 
> Full Summary: JJ and Hotch are happily together and have been for a few years. They are married with Jack, Henry, and now a daughter as well. Things are going perfectly, too perfectly... That's when Hotch ends up in a terrible accident and when he comes to, he reaches out and asks for Haley. He's completely unaware he's been married to JJ, that he has a daughter and that Gideon left the team. This fic will show JJ and Hotch struggling to rebuild their relationship and show Hotch having to cope with Haley's death all over again.
> 
> Author's Note: This idea has been something in my mind for awhile. It was originally meant to be for an original story and not fanfiction, but then I decided on this.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this! And thank you so much for reading!
> 
> And please, leave kudos/comments if you'd like to see more.
> 
> Also, please check out my forum on FanFiction if you're on there? It has weekly prompts and ways to get reviews and such. If enough Ao3 people show up on there, I may look at doing Ao3 specific review threads.

To an outsider, the scene would have seemed chaotic and out of control. However, to the Hotchners, it was just another regular morning.

"Mom, you promised! No more ham sandwiches," Jack Hotchner whined as he peered into his lunch kit, dramatically giving a gag of disgust. He lifted the sandwich by the edge of the bag like it'd was holding something toxic.

"Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry," JJ said apologetically, now remembering her promise. "Give it here," She reached out to take the sandwich from him, "Is tuna okay?"

Jack nodded and sat down at the table beside Henry, who was already stuffing pancakes into his mouth.

"That's gross," seven year old Samantha shouted loudly, pointing at Henry.

In response, Henry opened his mouth to show her what was going on in there.

"Eww! Mom! He's doing it again," Sam said with disgust, turning her head to look anywhere else.

"Henry, chew with your mouth closed," JJ reprimanded him, now mixing mayonnaise into the tuna.

"Can I have tuna now instead of ham?" Henry asked, swallowing his pancakes much to his sister's relief.

Sighing, JJ nodded, and told him, "Bring me your ham sandwich out of your bag and I'll replace it." She waited. She now expected Sam to demand a new sandwich as well, but she didn't. Then again, JJ should have expected that. Sam had the same sandwich every day, faithfully. Peanut butter. Just plain old peanut butter. There was no reason that would change now.

"Mom, can I have the peanut butter?" Sam asked, almost as if to clarify JJ's thoughts.

JJ nodded, setting the spoon down to reach up into the cupboard to get the peanut butter. Sam always put peanut butter on her pancakes. Sometimes she added jam. This seemed weird to JJ, and she had no idea where Samantha picked this up, but it was what Sam liked.

"Mom, can I have two oranges instead of an apple and an orange?" Jack asked, his mouth stuffed full of bacon. Again, Sam cringed. Boys were so gross.

"Don't talk with your mouth full," JJ said in a lecturing tone, "and no."

"But mom! I don't like apples," Jack complained, leaning back on his chair.

"Mom! Henry's kicking me under the table," Sam said, her voice hitting a high octave JJ hadn't thought possible.

Before JJ had a chance to respond, Hotch was already walking in. "JJ, honey, have you seen my tie?" he asked.

"Which one?" she replied as she turned towards Henry to stop him picking on Sam.

"The one that matches this suit," Aaron said with an annoyed tone, as if that explained everything.

JJ looked over at her husband, eyeing his suit up and down. A dark blue tie... he had how many of those, and he couldn't find one?

As if Hotch could read her mind, he said, "each one in the drawer goes with a different blue suit."

Rolling her eyes, she finally finished mixing the tuna. She asked, with a tone of frustration, "Did you check the laundry room?" Why couldn't he just use another? It's not like anyone could tell that he was wearing a different tie that 'didn't belong' with that suit. They were near identical!

"I figured since you did laundry... you'd know if it was in there," Hotch responded.

"Henry had it!" Samantha suddenly spoke up, looking over at Henry with a small smile.

"Did not!" Henry claimed, shooting his younger sister a glare.

"Yes, he did," Sam insisted, "He was using it for some sort of game."

"A blind fold," Henry muttered under his breath. He had used it to play Marco Polo out in the yard with his friends from up the block. They'd stopped playing when Jamie slipped over a root and hurt his arm.

"Where is it?" Hotch asked, turning to cross his arms at Henry. Henry was attempting to look innocent, but failing miserably.

Henry looked down guiltily as he reached into his back pack and pulled the tie out.

When he saw that it was all crumpled and had something sticky on it, Hotch sighed. "I'll just go use a different blue tie," he said, "Who will know the difference?"

JJ turned quickly around toward Hotch, fully intending to ask him why he hadn't just done that in the first place, but he was already gone.

"Mom! He's still kicking me!" Sam complained.

"Henry, quit kicking your sister," JJ said, clearly exasperated, as she put the new sandwiches into little bags.

"She started it!" Henry said quickly.

"Mom! We're going to miss the bus," Jack shouted in a panic, accidentally knocking over his milk and spilling it across the table.

"Eww! Mom, there's milk on my pancakes!" Sam suddenly whined, sticking her tongue out in disgust.

"Here," JJ said, passing Jack his new lunch and before she could kiss him good bye, he was already out the door.

Both Henry and Samantha only had a few minutes to spare until their bus arrived.

"Both of you, get your shoes on," JJ told them, now trying to wipe up as much of the milk as she could.

There were a few very peaceful seconds before...

"Mom! I can't find my other shoe," Sam said miserably, coming in with only her left shoe on.

"Wear a different pair," JJ said tiredly, not bothering to look up.

"But I want to wear these ones!" Sam declared loudly.

Groaning quietly, JJ set the cloth down helped her daughter look. It took her seconds to spot the missing shoe. Raising an eyebrow at her daughter, JJ pulled it out from under Sam's back pack and passed it to her. JJ told her, "Now hurry up, your bus will be here any minute."

It seemed a miracle when both kids were finally ready and walking out the door.

"Bye mom!" the kids shouted over their shoulders.

"I love you both, and I'll see you after school," JJ called out, watching carefully as they walked down the driveway to wait.

JJ watched both Henry and Sam until the bus came. After seeing so many cases, she was more careful than most parents. She tried not to be over protective but sometimes... it was so difficult.

JJ now only worked part time at the BAU. Sometimes, she went out on cases with them but for the most part she stayed home where she felt she belonged. With her children. A few years ago, she would have never thought it possible for her to step away but now, she aimed to do a week on and a week off. Sometimes, cases didn't allow the luxury of that break but it generally worked out okay.

Her eyes flickered towards the mess in the kitchen. The dishes and food were everywhere, and she paused to savour a silent moment. She wouldn't give this up for anything.

"JJ, honey?" Hotch asked her, breaking her out of her moment of peace, "Can you tell that this tie doesn't belong with this suit?"

Groaning, she turned to face him but instead of being annoyed, JJ laughed quietly. This was her life now and she loved every min


	2. Chapter 2

"Mom! When is Dad coming home?" Sam whined, throwing herself down on the couch.

"Soon," JJ responded, stirring the mashed potatoes some more. She bit down on her lip in concentration while she added a bit more milk.

"How soon?" Samantha demanded, wandering into the kitchen. Sam inhaled deeply. Dinner smelt wonderful.

"Very soon," JJ said, shooting a quick look to the clock before back down to the mashed potatoes. Some of these lumps just did not want to come out today.

"Like what time?" Sam asked, getting a bit impatient.

"I don't know." JJ sighed in defeat. Those mashed potatoes were as mashed as they were going to get. Still watching Sam out of the corner of her eye, she took the chicken out of the oven. It was always hard on the kids when Hotch was away on a case. She was sure he'd be home within the hour, but Sam and Henry got more anxious with each minute that went by. She could see Jack peering through the curtains every time a car went by. She knew that Jack often missed his dad, but Jack was getting to an age where he tried not to show it as much. But it was in his eyes every time he spoke to his dad on the phone when he was away on a case, or when he said good bye to his dad in the morning knowing he wouldn't be home that night.

JJ empathized with them. She felt a twinge of guilt as she wondered how they must feel when she was with the team, too. She wanted to be out there putting the serial killers away and anyone else that shouldn't be in the same world that her children were growing up in, but spending time with her family was also incredibly important to her. Doing a week on and a week off work was getting difficult. Hotch had to pull special strings for her to be able to do that, and she knew she'd have to make a choice soon. But how could she?

A car drove by, and she saw all three children this time run to the window to see. She heard the groans of disappointment when the car kept going by. Hotch should be here by now, what was taking him?

"How much longer?" Henry asked, trying to see what was for dinner.

"Not much longer," JJ told him. "Go wash your hands." She gave him a gentle nudge.

Sighing, Henry went to do just that with Sam at his heels.

But she wasn't to escape the questions. Jack came in next, chewing on his lip thoughtfully. "How long ago did Dad call?"

"About a half hour ago," JJ said trying not to let the worry show on her face. It was only a fifteen minute drive. He said he was leaving the BAU, so he should be home by now.

"How come he's not here yet?" Jack asked, watching the window carefully for any lights. He pressed his nose against the glass, narrowing his eyes to peer down the street.

"Maybe he got held up at work," JJ suggested not quite believing this herself. What was taking him so long? It wasn't just the kids that were anxious, but her as well.

Jack, however, seemed to accept this and he walked over to the counter. He reached into the drawer for the forks to begin setting the table. JJ smiled at him. Aaron would be here soon.

"We washed our hands, is Dad home yet?" Sam asked, cheerfully walking in the kitchen with Henry right behind her.

"Not yet," JJ said, letting out a small sigh.

"How much longer?"

* * *

Aaron Hotchner sighed as he set the phone down. He shot a glance at the piles of paperwork on his desk, knowing they needed to be taken care of, but JJ had said the kids were anxious to see him. They were making dinner. And he missed them. The paperwork would still be there in the morning. It wasn't going anywhere.

Shooting the unwanted papers a quick glare, he stood up and slipped his coat on. His stomach growled at the thought of what JJ had cooked up tonight, and he longed to hug her and the kids.

His eyes flickered one last time to the work that would await him in the morning, but then he shut the door behind him and proceeded to walk down the stairs towards the elevator.

While he went down on the elevator toward the parking lot, he thought about his life. He thought of his family, his job, and even his place in the world. Nothing was ever perfect, but right now he was truly happy.

_"One day, you'll think of her and you won't hurt. You'll be happy."_

JJ had said that to him, quite a few years ago. And she was right. However, neither of them had expected that she would have such an important role in his happiness.

A small smile touched his lips as he got into his car. He paused for a couple more moments, taking the picture of his family out from the visor. He remembered that day as if it was was yesterday. It'd been so difficult to get all the kids into their nice outfits, and to have them all smile at the same time. The first time they'd snapped the picture Jack had been giving Henry the typical bunny ears and the second time, Sam had stuck her tongue out at the camera. It took awhile, but they'd finally taken exactly the photo he hoped to have. JJ still had the other pictures developed. She said it expressed who they were as a family.

Aaron put the picture back where it belonged and pulled out his wallet. In there, he pulled out the picture of Haley and Jack. JJ knew that Haley would always hold a place in his heart, and JJ accepted this. This was a relief to him, as he couldn't imagine ever forgetting about Haley, but JJ was the one in his life now. And he did love her. Hotch tried not to get emotional as he put the picture back.

_"I want him to believe in love because it is the most important thing. You need to show him. Promise me."_

Minutes later, he was on the road. A quiet song played on the radio, and Hotch checked his watch anxiously. It'd take another five minutes to get home. That was all. That was it. But it felt like so long...

When he lifted his gaze up to look back at the road, that was when Hotch's stomach did a flip. Headlights. There were headlights in his lane. Brakes. He turned the wheel. It was no use. The seconds it took to impact seemed like an eternity. There he sat, knowing that it would be no use. He was going to hit the truck and yet all he could think of was JJ, Jack, Henry and Sam.

During those seconds, Aaron saw their faces clearly in his head. His breathing stopped in his panic. His heart hammered so hard it hurt. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. This wasn't real. His family needed him. It wasn't his time to die.

He could hear JJ's voice in his head, calling his name.

The last thing Hotch heard was the crunching of metal. The last thing he saw was their faces. And the last thing he felt was pain. Not the physical kind, but the emotional kind. In that moment, he felt like he'd never see his family again. And this was enough bring him to tears.

That's when darkness overtook him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be posted soon! I'm almost done writing it.  
> I hope you enjoy this.
> 
> Kudos and comments are so appreciated.
> 
> I also started a General Writing Prompts forum on FanFiction.net and if you have an account over there, I'd appreciate if you checked it out! There are ways to get reviews and etc. Link is on my profile.

"Where is he?" JJ demanded, as she ran into the waiting room so fast it seemed her feet barely touched the ground. Her blue eyes were filled with tears and Derek stood up quickly, worried she'd tumble to the ground.

"JJ," Emily started, then broke off, giving her friend a sympathetic look. Her gaze met Derek's briefly, then focused back on JJ, who was becoming more hysterical with every passing moment.

"Where is he?" JJ asked shrilly as her panic took over. The entire time since she'd received the phone call, she'd had to remain calm, for her kids. Now that she didn't have to act strong for them, the tears began to flow freely down JJ's face. She had known something was wrong. She had felt it. How was she to keep acting like everything was okay? Nothing was okay.

"JJ," Emily began again, trying to calm down her shaken friend.

Groaning loudly, JJ felt overcome with frustration as she pushed carelessly past Emily. She ran right into Derek.

He caught sight of Emily's face and realized there was no point in trying to hide things from JJ.

"Hotch is in surgery right now, JJ," Derek said, trying to sound soothing.

"How bad is it?" she demanded, "And don't you sugar coat it. Professional to professional."

"This isn't a professional thing. It's personal and-" Derek stopped, seeing a look in her face, that made him realize there there was no point arguing with her, "It's bad. JJ, they don't know if he's going to make it."

She'd known it in her head, by the way people were acting, but hearing it in his words made it more real. JJ lost all the strength in her legs and just collapsed. Luckily, Derek and Emily were able to catch her, but she didn't even notice. The tears came pouring out of her, and all she could think about was wondering how she was going to tell the kids.

Without thinking, she pushed out of the grip of her friends and forced herself past Reid like he wasn't even there, not catching the hurt look on his face as he'd come over to hug her. Somehow, JJ made it into a chair. She had to see Aaron. She had to.

The minutes dragged on, creating the illusion that time was almost standing still. These slow minutes soon turned into hours. Hotch's condition didn't seem change. He was still unconscious, or that was what the doctors told her anyways. They told her he could wake up any time but each hour that went by, the chances of this happening decreased. Still, she refused to give up hope. She didn't go home. She stayed by his side. Penelope helped JJ incredibly by watching Jack, Henry and Sam for her. The team took turns staying with her.

She'd tried to ask Reid for more specifics about the condition. He claimed to not know. He was a terrible liar. It was obvious to her that there was something he didn't want her to know.

_"Are you having doubts?" the voice had asked her._

_JJ spun around to hear Aaron at the door. "Don't you open that door!" she demanded, as she noticed the knob moving._

_"Do you really believe that it's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding?" Aaron asked through the door. She heard the amusement in his tone._

_"Ouch," JJ mumbled as Emily tugged the brush through her hair, "No, but it can't hurt to be safe, right?" she said with a smile, "And no, no doubts. Not a single one."_

_"Me neither," he said softly, "I'll see you at the altar."_

_Stifling a laugh, JJ grinned. They weren't getting married at an altar, but she'd bite. "I'll see you there," she answered._

_"Not even one tiny little doubt?" Garcia asked in amazement, thinking of her own reluctance to marry, as she dabbed a bit more blush onto JJ's cheek._

_"Not a single, solitary, tiny, itty bitty little doubt," JJ said happily, her eyes already watering with emotion, "This is where we're meant to be."_

She didn't have doubts then, and she most certainly did not have them now. He'd pull through. He had to. For her, for him, for the team, and most especially, for their kids. What would her life be without him?

* * *

Two long, cold nights passed in a blur. Once again, like she'd done so many times in the past couple days, she walked into Hotch's room with her coffee in hand. This time, she was so startled that the coffee nearly tumbled out of her hand to spill on the floor. He was awake.

"Hotch!" she exclaimed running over beside the bed. She reached over to take his hand and he allowed this briefly before pulling back.

"JJ," he said forcing a tired smile, "Thank you for being here."

She nodded, "Of course, any time," she answered. Relief swelled in her at his recovery, but if she had allowed the profiler in her to take over, she'd have realized how strange his actions and words were compared to what they should have been.

"I don't mean to sound like I'm not being grateful, because I am, but do you know when Haley and Jack will be by?"

"Haley?" JJ choked out in shock. She understood him asking for Jack, but couldn't yet grasp why he hadn't mentioned Henry or Samantha.

"I assume she's been worried about me, too," Hotch said, not picking up on her tone, "Has anyone told her I'm awake?"

JJ felt sudden tears spring to her eyes. She felt an overwhelming rush of emotions. Aaron thought Haley was still alive. She felt sympathy for him, knowing the pain he'd soon be in. But did this mean he forgot her? What they had built? Their family? Her head swirled back to an earlier time, back to their first day of marriage. And it filled her with confusion and heartbreak. How could he forget everything? How could he forget their life together? Was this real? Did he not love her any more?

_"I'll always love you," he said kissing her forehead._

_"Promise?" JJ said, allowing a childlike plea to enter her voice._

_"I promise."_

"I'll be back," JJ said to Hotch, forcing a quick smile before darting out of the room. She went into the bathroom and as soon as the door closed, she collapsed onto the floor. What was going on? Tears came again, tears that seemed like they would never end.

"JJ," said a voice behind her.

She looked over her shoulder to see Dr. Spencer Reid, as she stepped quietly out into the hall from the bathroom.

"I didn't know how to tell you," he said softly, "I'm sorry."

"What is going on? He thinks Haley's alive," JJ said, her tone dull, and full of disbelief.

"I know," The young profiler replied. He stopped himself from going into a detailed explanation of the medical condition, and tried to simplify it for her, "He's lost years worth of memory."

"We have a child together," JJ said stiffly. JJ felt emotionally drained and overwhelmed.

"I know," Reid answered.

"Is this permanent?" JJ asked. She realized that should have been the first question she asked. With everything else, it was just too much. She was scared to hear the answer.

"There's no way of knowing that. I'm sorry," Reid told her, feeling useless. There was little he could do to comfort or help his friend.

"Who's going to tell him?" JJ asked. Before Spencer could answer, she turned and strode back into the small, cold hospital room. She was barely aware of Reid calling after her.

"Are you okay?" Hotch asked her as she entered.

She recognized the tone. Aaron did care for her well being, but he wasn't in love with her.

Taking a deep breath, she forced a smile, and sat in the chair beside him, "I'm fine," she replied coolly, knowing it was as far from the truth as it could be.

"Did you go to find Haley and Jack?" he asked hopefully.

"Hotch," JJ started quietly, then paused. She reached out to grab his hand instinctively, but caught herself in time. Her chest felt tight, and tears formed in her eyes.

"What's wrong? Are they okay? Were they in the car?" His words were coming out so quickly she had a hard time understanding him.

"Jack's okay, but Haley..."

The emotions played out over his face. Relief. His son was okay, and then his face crumbled. He reached up with his hand to cover his mouth. He so desperately wanted to believe that Jennifer Jareau was the type to lie about this sort of thing, but she wasn't. And if she said it was true...

"Hotch. I'm so sor-" JJ began.

"I need to be alone right now," Aaron stated abruptly, cutting her off.

The words sounded so lifeless. And though she knew this wasn't about her, it felt like a punch to the gut.

JJ didn't say anything. She turned to leave, and walked quickly into the hallway, feeling tears spilling down her cheeks.

"My husband doesn't know who I am," JJ stated numbly, the words slipping out between breaths, "He's still in love with his dead ex wife who left him, and I..." she trailed off. Emily didn't say anything, she just held her friend. There was nothing Emily could think of to say that would help. Not really.

"Why didn't the doctors tell him before I saw him?" JJ asked, "Why did I think it was a good idea to be the one to tell him?" The fact was, she knew the answer to the second question. They hoped, as she did, that if she was the one to tell him, he'd remember everything. "And he still doesn't know I'm his wife."

Emily exchanged a look with Garcia. They stood uncomfortably with JJ in the hospital waiting area. This was such a difficult situation, and neither knew exactly what to do. The rest of the team had gone home to get rest, and they'd promised to stay to be there for JJ.

"Will called. Henry wants to see Aaron. And so do Samantha and Jack, of course," JJ told them, her sadness audible, "And Haley's sister wants to bring them by." Samantha. How did you tell a kid that their dad didn't know who they were? "Of course I had to tell them he wasn't ready to be seen."

"JJ, just take a few deep breaths," Garcia suggested, rubbing her friends back comfortingly.

"Jennifer?"

She looked up to see one of Hotch's doctors standing in front of them.

"He's asking for you," said the doctor.

Sniffling, she tried to compose herself. She lifted her sleeve to wipe the tears off her face.

"How do I look?" she asked her friends, biting her bottom lip to try and prevent new tears from falling.

"Beautiful," Emily told her reassuringly.

"Absolutely stunning," came Garcia's response.

JJ knew she looked like crap, bags under her bloodshot eyes, pale complexion, but it was still comforting to hear.

As she entered the room, she found herself unable to look at him.

"I'm sorry," he started off, "about earlier."

"You just found out someone you loved died. It's understandable." She finally looked at him, and his eyes mirrored hers. He looked tired, sad, and broken.

"I just spoke to one of the doctors," he started off, "And he filled me in on a few things. So you're... I mean we're..."

"Married," JJ said casually. She wasn't sure why, but she nearly laughed.

"We're married," Hotch said, and the shock on his face was heart breaking for JJ, "And me and Haley..."

"Split up," JJ finished, now taking a seat in the chair.

"And now she's..."

JJ didn't finish the sentence this time.

"This is all so surreal," he said quietly. "I don't know what I'm feeling."

"I understand," JJ mumbled.

As saddening as it was for her, she did understand. She couldn't imagine being where he was. And it just made her admire his strength all the more. As defeated as he was, he was still trying to put it all together. He'd found out the love of his life was dead. And here he was, apologizing to her for needing time alone, and trying to piece his life together.

"Where's Jack?"

"He's with Haley's sister," JJ answered him, "and Samantha."

The confusion on his face caused her chin to tremble, and she had to turn her head away. It took her a couple moments to look back at him, and despite all the things he wanted to know, he was patient. "Samantha is our daughter," JJ told him.

"We have a daughter." Hotch shook his head as if it was some dream he could wake up from. But a couple seconds later, he smiled as he said, "I always wanted a girl, too."

"She's seven," JJ told him.

"What about Will?"

"That's a long story probably best left for another time."

Hotch nodded and replied, "You're probably right."

There were so many things she wanted to ask him. Where did they go from here? What did they tell their kids? Obviously not the truth, but this was the question she was most scared to hear the answer to. Was he willing to try and make this work between them?


	4. Spot

Jennifer Jareau sat nervously on the edge of the hard black plastic chair and looked up at the big circular clock above the bed, as its hands came together to tell her that the morning had already passed. The half-emptied lunch plates sat on the bedside table, growing cold. She would have pressed him to eat more, but she didn't feel like she had the right. Besides, she had left at least as much food behind. Her stomach was twisted with anxiety, and she could only imagine he felt the same. The sun shone brightly through the window behind her, giving the room a warmth that JJ wished she could feel from the man in the bed in front of her. She and Aaron Hotchner were married, yet he felt like barely more than a stranger right now. It was noon, and the kids would be here any time now.

It had been an overwhelming and exhausting few days for JJ, and she could tell Aaron felt the same.

"Now then, one more time. What are their favorite sports?" JJ asked.

"Jack plays soccer, Henry plays baseball and Samantha plays basketball," Hotch replied, with the measured tone of someone rehearsing lines they had repeated a dozen times before.

JJ had delayed the kids with excuse after excuse for why they couldn't come to visit Aaron before today. Obviously, they loved their dad and wanted to see him, and it had broken her heart to hear their disappointment each time she had to delay their visit. JJ had sighed with relief when Hotch had agreed that he was a father to all of them and would act the part, even if the only one he remembered was Jack – and a much smaller, much different Jack at that. Even if he didn't remember, Hotch knew if JJ (and the others on the team, for that matter) said Samantha was his daughter and Henry was his stepson, it must be true.

The children had been told their dad had been in an accident, and told about all the tubes and wires and machines that were connected to him now. They had an idea of what they would see and knew they might hurt Hotch if they hugged him right now. The kids had also been told that their dad had a few memory issues, because of the accident. They certainly had not been told the extent of his memory issues. JJ hoped this explanation would allow the kids to understand if Hotch made a few mistakes when he talked to the kids, but that would only go so far. JJ and Hotch had been practicing what felt like twenty six hours a day for a few days now, so that Hotch would hopefully know every little detail about the kids that he should know from raising them and living with them for years. JJ had also hoped going over these details would spark the return of the actual memories for Hotch, but so far that hadn't happened.

Today the kids would be coming to the hospital. JJ hoped desperately that her preparation with Hotch would be enough.

She opened her mouth to ask another practice question, then stopped as they heard a soft knocking on the door to the room.

"Come in!" Hotch called out a moment before JJ could do the same. JJ wasn't sure she could have kept the nerves from her voice the way her husband did, but she was sure she saw unease in his eyes. Sometimes she thought he was a totally different man than the one she had married, and other times she could read him perfectly.

The door opened smoothly and Haley's sister took one step inside before three children quickly slipped around her and rushed to Hotch's bedside. Jack stopped suddenly about a foot from the bed, holding up his arms to keep the other two from moving forward. "We could hurt him if we hug him right now, remember?" Jack said over his shoulder in a loud whisper. Hotch felt a rush of warmth at the sight of his child, shocked at how different he looked but sure he could see the same features in Jack's face that he remembered. Something in Jack's face made him think of Haley, and he had to blink to keep a sudden wave of grief from overtaking him. His oldest child, Hotch reminded himself. No matter what he could remember or could not, the other two were also his family.

"Daddy!" Samantha cried out loudly, "I missed you sooooo much!" Jack and Henry were only seconds behind in adding their voices to hers.

"I scored two goals in my match yesterday!" Jack called out, "We have another on Saturday, can you come?"

"I made you a picture!" Henry shouted, fighting for attention, "Do you want to see?"

Hotch held back a laugh, "I missed you, Sammie," he said, feeling a connection to her even though he didn't remember her, "And I missed you boys, too. I don't know if I'll make it out of this room for Saturday, Jack, but I'll try. And I'd love to see your picture, Henry."

Aaron and JJ were just catching their breath when Jessica, Haley's sister, walked slowly up behind the kids. They were crowded around the side of the bed, next to JJ, who was leaning back uncomfortably in the only chair in the room.

"I didn't give them any sugar today, if that's what you were wondering," Jessica said in an amused tone, "They've been like this since they woke up this morning, practically bouncing off the walls with excitement to see their daddy."

Hotch spoke with a contrite tone, "I'm sorry if they were difficult."

Jessica cut him off quickly, "Nonsense. It's been a pleasure taking care of them. And all this," she waved vaguely around the room, "Is hardly your fault."

Aaron smiled at her. She looked almost exactly as he remembered, and he had to bite down on a fresh wave of grief as he noted how similar Jessica looked to her sister, Haley. Her sister, who he would never see again. Her sister, who in his memory, he had lived with just days ago, but who had actually been gone for years. Dead, for years.

He shook his head gently. This was not the time to get lost in memories, no matter how strange, powerful and confusing they might be. Jessica was starting to look a bit concerned, and he could feel JJ watching him nervously, too. He broke Jessica's gaze, and looked at the kids again, asking with an excitement he had a hard time feeling, "So where's that picture, Henry?"

Henry stepped forward, leaning against the bed as he handed his father a drawing of the whole family and spoke up, "I thought you'd want a picture of all of us in your room here," Henry said eagerly, "Here's you and Mommy getting ready for work. And here's Jack, and Sam, and Spot, and me."

Aaron looked at the picture, smiling, then stopped and looked up at JJ with puzzlement on his face, "Wait a minute. Spot?" Hotch asked.

"Yeah!" said Henry with excitement, "Don't you remember Spot?"

JJ spoke up quickly, "Now Henry, we've told you before that we can't get a dog, at least right now," she told him in a tone that made it clear this was not a new discussion.

"Awww. I thought maybe if Dad could... umm... remember the family with Spot, we'd have to get a Spot," Henry replied shyly.

Hotch laughed softly, "Sorry buddy, no can do. I'll give you points for being clever, but you know it's not nice to fib, no matter how much you want a dog," he said.

"Can't we think of a better name than Spot?" Samantha piped up.

They all laughed, and despite the awkwardness of it all, Aaron Hotchner could see how he fit into this family. He had a lot to learn about, if his memory didn't come back soon.


End file.
